I'm not HUGE on designer labels but...

In the last few months I've been compiling what I will call a "Style Look Book." The idea is that I go through my old fashion magazines and tear out pages that I think are good looks or advice, whether it's hair, make up, home decor, or fashion clothing and accessories. Since I seem to have been blessed with the body similar to these models, I find that I can tell easily if I would like the combination on my body type.

When it comes to the clothing pages, I've been trying to make sure that I'm not only looking at what's popular and trendy now, but what will look good in the future, like how to layer a silk shirt with a bowed collar mixed with a sweater and a pencil skirt. Warm, and suitable for the office or a classroom.

I subscribe to Lucky Magazine for 2 reasons: 1) I had enough rewards money in one of my survey companies to redeem for the subscription, and 2) I love that the magazine includes stickers in which you can mark the pages that have things you really like and would consider buying (although maybe not the designer they are advertising).

In the September 2011 issue of Lucky Magazine, on page 245, I stumbled upon an editorial I'd obviously only skimmed over before because there was such a dress combined with such a shoe that I just cannot ignore. The editorial was labeled "The King and I," the idea was mixing ladylike pieces with stark prints, retro details, and a 'hint of Elvis."

Wait!! She's wearing stars? On a dress? And piano keys? On her shoes? In stark and bold black and white? (Did these people raid my mind's dream closet?)

I immediately started hunting. I saw that both the shoes and the dress were by Dolce & Gabbana (EEK, way out of my price range!), but nevertheless, I decided to at least see where I could find them. Wouldn't you know? They aren't in the Dolce and Gabbana store online. Or in any search I tried on Google. Or Amazon. Or Ebay. FINALLY on an 8th page on Google pictures, I found the shoes.

Dolce and Gabbana had used them in their Fall 2011 runway show, and pictures could be found Vogue's review of Fall Collections.

The bad news? Still can't find anything with a price tag. Not even for the "If I won a million dollars, I would buy..." scenario.

You can find the whole collection here: http://www.vogue.com/collections/fall-2011/mdgabbana/review/#/collection/runway/fall-2011/mdgabbana/4 , and look at all the other cute items they put down the runway.

So now, if you didn't know before, I really love shoes. Especially stilettos. And I love music. Which is why the piano stilettos are that much more awesome. And I've always loved stars on accessories and clothing. And I love black and white together in prints (if you've been to my apartment, you've seen all the zebra print).

I'm done squealing and freaking out, but I have one last question: Are people really going to start wearing socks like that with stilettos? It's going to be a dark and dim future for me if that's the case...

All I know is these two models are EXTREMELY lucky to be wearing those shoes.

Being Thankful

Every once in awhile I start having really negative outlooks on my life, and I immediately have a "Come to Jesus" session with myself. There is no reason why I should ever give in to excessive doubt and despair; I have SO MUCH.

An acquaintance of mine started a tradition on Facebook a few years ago, and has since been labeled 'The Diane Challenge." The idea is that for every day in November, you post something in your status that you are thankful for.

I've seen a lot of mixed reviews about it. Most of my friends have jumped on the bandwagon, even if they don't know Diane, and post their thankfulness every day if they are able. Some others, however, find it to be an annoyance. "Shouldn't we be thankful every day? Why does this have to be popular during Thanksgiving?"

I respect both opinions, I really do. I tend to encourage the thankful statuses, even though I myself am not participating this year (November snuck up on me and now I don't think it's worth trying to catch up).

It's not a popularity thing for me; it's about recognizing how much we really have when others live with so much less. The holiday season has been taken over by marketing; it's no longer about being thankful for your family, for the ability to travel (a lot of people in this world don't own vehicles), for the exorbitant amount of food on the table (that could feed a family in a 3rd world country for a month), and shopping the next day (Black Friday) for the excessive gifts that we don't really need. The reason for the season is Jesus Christ. He gave EVERYTHING so that we may live, and instead of blessing others we succumb to the shopping hype put on by the media and tell our children to watch for Santa.

I don't need presents. I have a mother and a father who are still alive; who love me and take care of me. I am not only going to college, but working on getting a Master's degree. I have an apartment. I have a heater and an air conditioner. I have a wooden floor with carpet. I have running hot and cold water. I have food in my refrigerator and my cupboards. I have a bed. I have shoes. I have more than one set of clothes to wear every day. I have pets. I have a TV and a computer. I have cable and internet. I have books and movies.

I HAVE TOO MUCH. How could I ask for more?

The reason for the thankfulness statuses are to help us all realize how much we really have when the media and society tells us we never have enough. If they bother you, I'm sorry. I find it spiritually humbling for me to give thanks to God for all the many blessings that I have and don't need or deserve, especially when I see the poor in my own backyard who might not remember what it's like to be warm in the winter time.

I want to learn to give back. I want to bless others, but in order to do it with a thankful and happy heart I must first understand and recognize my own blessings. This is not a glamorous topic, and I didn't have a lot of time to edit before posting, but I hope this will positively affect someone tonight.

Been Away for Awhile

Not that I think anyone has been checking everyday to see if I have posted...

... but on the off chance that you have, I apologize for my absence. Graduate school keeps me fairly busy with coursework, and the rest of the time I am either participating in, leading, or attending ensemble rehearsals and performances. Busy, busy, busy.

The weather has definitely changed over the last few days; we went from 70-80 degree weather to low 50s, and I had to bring out the scarves and woolen socks. If we had a fall, it's pretty much over now and well on the way to winter. As much as I love snow, I wish it didn't come with cold weather. I hate chilly bones. :(

On a more positive note, life is rolling along as it should be. I'm mostly keeping up with the coursework in my classes, and I don't spend too much time alone to think about being lonely. I know the big guy upstairs is looking over me, and I find comfort in knowing that His plan is greater than mine, so I need not be so disappointed when things don't turn out the way I want them to.

I started teaching voice lessons this semester, and I have learned so much about how to teach voice techniques and health, and also understand my own vocal strengths and weaknesses. As a teacher, you should never stop learning, and I think this is one of the first semesters in a long time where I find myself engaged and actively learning- not just listening and regurgitating for a test- tools that are going to influence my teaching style for years to come.

I have discovered so much about myself and what I would really love as a future career if I stay in the education field (I still desire a year or two in performance). I would love to be a choral music teacher either at the elementary or high school level, and also be an assistant band director or color guard instructor. I can't imagine my life without band and choir simultaneously, so this seems so logical. With my Master's in Vocal Pedagogy, I will also be able to make money outside of school teaching voice lessons (when I have the time, right?).

Right now I'm going to try to think less about marriage and starting a family. It is something that I want more than almost anything, but what I need is a balanced partnership. I haven't had a relationship possibly ever where the guy has wanted to take care of and provide for me as much as I have for him. I'm not saying I need boxes of chocolates, diamonds, and roses, but I do need gestures showing compassion and appreciation.

I am all about the other person; if he loves a certain sport or activity, I learn more about it and get myself involved in either learning to play/participate or being a spectator. I listen to his favorite kinds of music. I wear his favorite color more often. I learn to cook some of his favorite dishes.

Why, you might ask? Because he is important to me. No, I'm not going to pretend I like screamo-heavy metal, but I will learn to appreciate the vocal techniques that go into it, and possibly the musical intricacy (doubtful, but I would consider it). I don't want to change who I am, but I am willing to try new things and see if I like them, too.

On the same note, I would love it if the male showed the same kind of interest in me as I do in him, like in terms of my activities and enjoyments. I don't want a groupie, but some support in things that are important to me are welcomed and appreciated.

There are so many tangents I'm trying not to fly off into; a sure sign that I need to start blogging more regularly again. Until next time, my faithful followers, may the love of our Lord, Jesus Christ, bless you and keep you always.

Worth the wait

How do we determine in life what is worth waiting for?

I suppose it depends on your situation.

If you're in an ice cream parlor, it's probably not the best idea to just wait and wait until you know for sure you want chocolate fudge instead of mint chocolate; there's probably a growing line of annoyed people behind you. Just choose one and pay already.

How about it you're deciding on what classes you should register for this semester/year? Again, probably best you decide quickly instead of hoping that all the classes you hope to take will work out perfectly; you may end up having to take this class next year since it conflicts with another that you NEED. Oh, and if you don't decide quickly, the class will fill up so you'll miss out anyway.

How about love? Now that, right there, is when it gets really tricky and sometimes sticky.

I've been there, so I'm not speculating feelings or hearts. What if you really REALLY like one guy, and he's not really showing he's interested, and you kind of really like another guy who's definitely showing an interest in you? Do you wait for the one you REALLY like, or accept a date from the guy you like, just not as much?

That above basically describes my whole high school love life, which was essentially non-existent. I kept choosing the wrong one, and then I'd be unhappy and not commit myself to a relationship. But how do you know???

I can't say that I have all the answers. As my dad told me recently on the phone, "Falling in love is the easiest thing in the world. Staying in love is hard; it takes work. Some people aren't willing to put in the work."

Generally speaking, I think all of that is true. I've been in long term relationships before with someone who believed he loved me, and was left because the idea of dating a newly discovered crush seemed so much more interesting or fun. It's not right; it's not fair. But it is a part of life.

Getting crushes are so normal. What you do with those feelings are what makes or breaks your current relationship. How well do you really know someone after a few days verses the one you've dated over a year? I can't say I'm angry about it, but it does depress me.

What I think it comes down to are two things: happiness and sacrifice.

Are you currently happy with the person you're with in your life? If you are, why bother sacrificing that for something/someone that could end up being a crazy psycho?

If you aren't happy with that person, why have you not discussed ways on how to fix it? If you have and you aren't even trying to work on fixing it, then I got news for you: it's not going to work. Both people need to work to make a love stay strong.

The other is sacrifice: what would you be willing to do/give up in order to stay with that person? Not that they are asking; but in a hypothetical situation. If they got an amazing job in another state, would you be willing to make it work by either finding a job out there as well or devoting yourself to a long distance relationship?

Again, if the answer is no, you might want to examine why you are with that person. I've had a close friend ask me why I dated my boyfriend; he 'wasn't good looking enough' for me and was a 'nerd.' Well again, I think people are looking in the wrong areas. First of all, dating a nerd has it's advantages: you know they are capable of devotion to something if they are deemed that title, and that can mean the most attentive boyfriend you've ever had. Don't knock it til you try it.

 Second of all, I find him attractive, so it doesn't really matter if other people don't think so. If I was limited to only top notch looks and zero nerdy-ness I would be unhappy and surrounded by shallow guys who I can't have a decent conversation with and want all the wrong things from me.

A partner that treats you right and loves you for who you are is worth waiting for. I hope everyone learns that someday.

What makes a Melody?

We are all different and unique, and that's what makes this world an amazing place to live in: no two people are exactly alike, not even twins!

I know I often write about things that I observe, but there are some things that I do that I don't understand, so have fun with this! This will be redundant for people really close to me, but hey, you might've forgot something? (Unless you're my sister).

1.) I'm obsessed with having clean ear canals. 

My sister knows this well, because I think we have the same problem. I clean my ears probably twice a day, and I'll bet my apartment runs out of Q-Tips faster than most family residences. It seriously bothers the heck out of me if I can feel earwax. I'm not afraid of it by any means, just can't stand it like I can't stand a runny nose.

2.) I cannot sleep without socks on.

Even in the heat of summer, I need socks on. My feet (and hands) get oddly cold while the rest of my body stays warm and toasty, and basically always need something to help insulate my toes. I am super skinny with low amounts of body fat so I don't have a natural insulation that keeps me toasty at night. It stinks.

3.) I claim to hate anime, but...

In sixth grade I used to get up a half hour earlier than I needed to because I wanted to watch Sailor Moon while eating breakfast. I'm pretty sure I missed the bus a few times because I spent more time watching her episodes than getting ready for school. What makes this especially weird is that I find Serena/Usagi Tsukino/Sailor Moon EXTREMELY annoying. She is such a whiny crybaby, but I couldn't wait to find out what happened next. I recently was reunited with the show this past year using Veoh.com, and discovered a whole other season that never aired in the U.S. because of it's controversial content. I now know that several characters had their genders changed in the English versions because there's a lot of exploration in homosexuality and transexual characters. Interesting, huh? It's not a kids show in Japan!

Not gonna lie, I want to be one of these characters for Halloween this year. (shhh...)

And, of course, my favorite make up guru Michelle Phan has a Sailor Moon make up tutorial (which could be used for any of the characters!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2i5qkSxF60U

To see her latest make up transformations, check out her website:

http://www.michellephan.com/

4.) I'm obsessed with high heels.

And I'm just about 5'10'' or 177.8 cm standing barefoot. Problem? For some. I'm no super model, but I did take some modeling classes which made me practice walking a runway in high heels. I love the way my legs look in them, it just also makes me a foot taller than half of the male and female population in Missouri. I get lots of funny looks when I wear them, and people ask me things like "Aren't you tall enough?" Well, yes, I guess technically I am. But you'll have to deal with it.

**Some shoes I designed (but can't afford yet!) on http://www.shoesofprey.com/designer. You can design shoes that will be hand created using only the best materials like Italian leather and silk, but keep in mind that top quality and hand sewn shoes are pricey!

5.) I'm more than a little obsessed with cats.

But I also have a conscience. Just because I see adoptable cats doesn't mean I'm going to take them all home with me. I do try to pet nearly every cat I see, but I have a policy that there needs to be a proper ratio of cats to humans in the house to make sure all are getting proper love and attention that they need. I think the ration is 2-3 pets per person. Since I live by myself, I have capped it at 2 cats, although I am trying to find homes for kittens at my boyfriend's farm and DESPERATELY want to keep one for myself! 

Kitten (Oreo) I recently rescued and found a good home for!

The little boy kitty I want to take home with me! He's such a fluffy sweetheart! Any ideas for a possible name?

5.) I'm left handed.

According to wikipedia, approximately 10% of the world's population is left handed. Which I think may be less, since many countries and people in general discourage it. When I volunteer with Chinese students and need to write something, a lot tell me "You write with the wrong hand!" Well, no, it's not wrong, but it's not right, either. It's left. :) The only downside is that the side of my hand often gets smeared in pencil lead and ink when I write a lot, so I'm glad that I've become a faster typer; no ink to worry about!

6.) I do not consume caffeinated beverages.

Technically many things I love have caffeine in them, like chocolate, but I do not like coffee, tea, soda pop, or energy drinks. I used to drink grape soda as a child, like when my parents took us to the laundromat,  but I pretended to like the burn because I liked grape flavored things. Now I don't even bother. I hate the way carbonation burns. So why don't I just drink coffee? Well, I think it smells amazing but tastes rather disgusting. My sister used to have a terrible Mountain Dew addiction, but switched it over to coffee, and now she and her husband started blogging about their coffee critiques. http://chybowskicoffeecritiques.blogspot.com/ I can't say I NEVER drink tea, because once in a blue moon I drink chai tea latte, but more for the soothing treatment of a sore throat or an overused singing voice rather than alertness or focus. I also like hot chocolate because it tastes amazing. Apparently there's caffeine, but I wouldn't know.

I thinks that's about all I have time for today. :) Maybe you learned something, maybe you didn't, and maybe you don't give a fryin' fish either way. :) God bless you and yours always. <3

Prayers for a BIG Adventure

One of my very best friends, Laura, recently embarked on one of the bravest adventures I've ever known someone to do; she moved to another country by herself to teach English. Not just any country, either: Korea.

Can I say "Wow"? I never thought that someone could move to a foreign country of a different language without any family or friends moving with her. The idea just sounds terrifying to me. Granted, she does have friends who live in Korea, but it's not so likely that she will be near them or get to see them much. Laura has a a personality that is just so inviting, she has befriended international students from all over the world.  But moving to the other side of the world into a different culture, and different way of thinking and living? Not for the faint of heart.

She has been such a blessing in my life since I met her 5 years ago during freshmen orientation at our University. We knew we were both majoring in music and decided to become best friends right then and there.

Our first picture together. :) It was SO bright that day!

This is just such a huge step for any person to make and I just ask that my friends pray for her with me, that she have a blessed experience in Korea. She arrived just a few days ago, and I know that she is already making friends and blessing others with her love and compassion. She is currently attending a university to learn the Korean language for an intense couple of weeks, and then she'll be off on her own teaching English.

I can't express how proud of her that I am, or how selfish I feel for wanting her to come back so I won't be missing her, but God gave her a path, and she followed it without turning back. :)

Laura, Madison, and myself

Madison, Laura, myself (yes, with pink hair!)

Laura and I at her farewell dance party :)

She is such an amazing girl, and I'm so happy for her. Follow her updates through her blog, http://misslauritaliz.blogspot.com/ (the story of her dining hall faux-pas is quite hilarious). :)

Dreams and Goals: 2011-2021

I recently decided that it could be fun to once a year post all my goals for the upcoming year, 5 years, 10 years, etc. Now 5 to 10 years from now, I could reread these and find them extremely depressing, hilarious, or just sit and wonder "WTF was I thinking?" but it's the middle of a very hot day, and I can't think of anything better to do.

Within 1 year, I hope to...

1.) Travel outside of the country. I recently accepted a Graduate Assistantship with my choir department, and one perk of being in the top choir is that trips are half paid. So in May of 2012 (if all goes well) I will be in Germany and France singing and touring for 10 days.

2.) Finish my thesis. I know I just started my Master's program this past spring semester, but I feel that I can get through it quickly, and hopefully, I would be able to graduate either in the spring or summer of 2012 if I plan well. I think it would be slightly annoying to graduate in December again, and then actually deal with moving in snow and ice.

3.) Landed a job/internship that I enjoy. I know that sounds a bit of a stretch, but I'm open to a lot of different things at this point in my life. I have a degree in Music Education that certifies me for choral and instrumental programs, I will have a Masters in vocal pedagogy, and lots of options to either move or stay in the local area.  My ultimate dream would be to spend a couple years performing, like on a cruise, like with Disney. :)

I think that's a pretty good start for 1 year goals.

Within 5 years I hope to...

1.) Be working a full time job that I love. :) Right now I don't care if that means being a music teacher in an elementary, middle, or high school, or if I'm giving lessons in either a private studio or at home, or if I'm still performing somewhere. The skies the limit, so long as I am happy.

2.) Buy and own my first car. I have always driven family vehicles, which is great, because it's on my parents insurance and if any repairs were needed they paid for it! Starting this next week or so I will be driving a vehicle that belonged to my best friend who is going to be living in Korea teaching English for at least a year, so I'll get a little experience in responsibility, but still will be on my parents insurance. In five years I hope to be established to the point that I can afford to choose and buy my own vehicle. With a lot of luck, maybe something cool and eco friendly, like the new Toyota Hybrid Coupe...

3.) Live and support myself on my own! I do not want to be 28 and living with my parents unless there are extenuating circumstances that I'd rather not think about at the moment. If I was in a tough spot financially, then I would have to humble myself into living with them, but right now I just don't want that to be a possibility.

In 10 years I hope to...

1.) Be married. I almost put this in the 5 year category, but I am really starting to realize that there is no rush, unlike what southern Missouri seems to think. 23? It's not on the top of my priority list. 33? I would hope that someone would think me a good catch to marry by then. On a side note, I would love to have my wedding photos done by Katie Day, a personal friend and brilliant photographer. If you don't know her work, you are seriously missing out! Her blog posts and her galleries simply give me tears of joy.

http://katiedayphoto.com/

2.) Have (a) child(ren). For years and years I never wanted to have any children that could grow up and hate me, but I guess getting older means getting wiser, and knowing that I want to be a mom someday. If you follow my blog, you know that my two cats are currently my children, but someday I would like one that will grow to be tall like me and not shed hair all over my black clothes.

3.) Sponsor a child in a 3rd world country, and visit them. Yeah, this one is tough to put in a category. I would like for it to be a 5 year goal, but I'm not sure how much travel I'll be able to afford after graduating, looking for a job, and paying for the dreaded student loans. If I sponsor a child, I don't want my heartless money to go there, though I know it's needed, I want to actually establish a relationship and be there for that child.

http://www.childfund.org/

4.) Stay happy and thankful for God's overwhelming blessings in my life. I can never repay what He's done for me, but I want to be a fountain of love and compassion for others. Through Him, I can accomplish ANYTHING!